"For a while we pondered whether to take a vacation or get a divorce. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is something you always have."

"Sex between 2 people is a beautiful thing ; between 5 it's fantastic ..."

"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon."

"I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak."

"Thought: why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only for food: frequently there must be a beverage."

"How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?"

"If our actions stem from honesty, kindness, caring, and vision, then no matter what the result of our efforts, we have added something of value to our souls and to the world."

"Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved."

"Each religion, by the help of more or less myth which it takes more or less seriously, proposes some method of fortifying the human soul and enabline it to make its peace with its destiny."

"Every big problem was at one time a wee disturbance."

"America has been discovered before, but it has always been hushed up."

"Christmas is a holiday that persecutes the lonely, the frayed, and the rejected."